Friday, November 18, 2011

Day Five: A Change Is Gonna Come

Last night I drank a tiny glass of cheap white wine but still paid the price all night as I struggled to sleep. I kept thinking about things in the past that have nothing to do with the present, and I couldn't get warm. I am afraid to calculate how much sleep I actually got, but I made myself wake to my annoying alarm so I could practice for an hour before my voice lesson. I made my coffee and sat at the piano, staring at the keys for a good 10 minutes before I put the cup down and started playing. I decided to improvise in G Major. I find the key of G comforting. One black key makes things more interesting than C Major, but easier than the other Major keys. I was not awake enough to think too hard, so I let myself play a simple drone in the left hand and my right hand improvised on the scale. I was surprisingly calmed and energized by the time my 20 minute timer went off.

Soon it was time for my voice lesson with Katie, which was wonderful and challenging all at the same time. A beginning voice student was still singing as I waited outside her studio, and I remembered how hard those first years can be. It takes a lot of work to train your ears to hear pitches and then send the information to your voice. In high school, instrumental students scoffed at the singers, stereotyping us as brainless half-wits, but they had no idea how much work it takes to produce a good piece of vocal music. Oh well. There will always be haters. What can you do?

Today was day 5, and I can feel the change a comin'. When a sudden life change happens, it is normal to freak out. I now empathize with people who develop drug and alcohol problems after going through a sudden change like a divorce. Your whole world gets shaken up and it is tempting to grab at the easiest fix to make it through the day. I can tell I have made the right choice to put all of my energy into music. Music is the greatest alternative to chemical abuse, bad relationships, or TV watching, and it is just as addictive. For the first time in 8 months, I can say confidently that this was the best week I have had. It was challenging to get the practice done, but the results are already showing up, not just in my voice, but in my state of mind as well. So glad it's the weekend.... I'm only required to do 2 hours on Saturdays and Sundays. David's cutting me some slack.

See you guys tomorrow. Listen to some inspiring music for me.

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